A perfect Storm…this is what i call Marriage! Our mutual brokeness plays off of each other so prefectly it’s frightening. It’s like throwing a dog and a cat in a dryer. It is absolutely mad! Why would God do such a thing? Because marriage is a divine conspiracy. It is a conspiracy divinely arranged with divine intent. God lures us into marriage through love, sex, and loneliness, or the simple fact that someone paid attention, all those reasons that you got married in the first place. It doesnt really matter, he will do whatever it takes. He lures us into marriage then he will use it to TRANSFORM US!
Does this sound familiar…One likes a dark room….the other likes it bright! One loves scented candles…the other despises them! One likes to store things in drawers…the other likes to put things all on the counters! One has a habit of dissappearing out of the room without saying where he is going or why…the other communicates everything. Things that drives the other crazy!!! Now, to add to the personality differences, is the fact that we are MAN and WOMEN. We are a complete mystery to one another! I enjoy watching cooking shows…he enjoys man versus wild. Its amazing that we live together in the same house. It’s a wonder we don’t kill each other. A women enters the marriage with all her hurt and disappointments and marries and man she cant possibly please. A man with deep issues will cause her to withdraw from him. The way these things play into each other is chilling. You could not script a more frightening scenario.
Opposites attract all right! Our mutual brokenness is drawn together like a match and gunpowder!
Choose your tent mate carefully! You are going to spend lots of time with this person! By the time it’s over everything about them will drive you mad, the way they eat, the way they breathe, the way they pick there nails. You must start with people you are utterly compatible with! But God does the very opposite!!! He puts us with the OPPOSITE!!!
We all have a style of relating; we have a way we do life! Our carefully crafted approach colors the way we work, the way we love, the way we relate, the way we handle stress, the way we look at life, the way we simply have a conversation with someone. Our style of relating is born out of brokenness and sin, and it is the number one thing that gets in the way of real love and companionship, the shared adventure and all the beauty of marriage. It’s really that simple. The number one thing that gets in the way is OUR way! So God created an enviroment where we have to and it’s called marriage.
There are 2 people in this world., the clueless and the repentant. Those who are open to looking into there life and those who are not. Those who know they need God to change them, and folks who are expecting everyone else to change. There is great hope for the first group, the second bunch is choosing ignorance! The damge they are doing is almost unforgiveable. Talk about your differences. Accept each other for the person that you were created to be. Anything that drives your spouse crazy talk about it with a light heart and work on it. Understanding one another by understanding the unfolding story of their life is priceless. We can come along beside them and help them overcome difficulties so much easier and more tenderly when we understand “where they came from”. When we understand one anothers brokenness we’ll find greater compassion for what previously drove us nuts. Set aside time to hear the story of one anothers lives. 🙂